We've reached the end of our burnout series. We've talked about the signs and the causes. Now for the part I most want you to hear: there is a way out.
Whether you're close to burnout, already in it, or worried about someone you love, three things are fundamental to preventing it and coming back from it: self-care, connection and boundaries.
1. Self-care: the foundation
Self-care is the most important of the three, and in many ways it holds the other two. It isn't bubble baths and to-do lists. It's the basics that keep a human being running.
- What you put in your body. When we're burned out and numb, it's tempting to dull the feeling even more, with alcohol, food, endless scrolling or other habits that take more than they give. Notice what you're reaching for, and choose one thing that nourishes you instead.
- Movement. You don't need to go to the gym and work out like crazy. A 15-minute walk in the evening counts. Moving your body shifts the energy that gets stuck with negative thoughts and emotions.
- Sleep and rest. Lack of sleep is both a symptom and a cause of burnout, so protecting it matters. Go to bed on time and create a routine. And if sleep isn't coming easily yet, find other ways to rest during the day.
- Mindfulness. I love mindfulness, and I think it's a practice we all should have. It's a wonderful tool for burnout and for so much else. Start with five minutes of slow breathing, or a cup of tea with no phone.
2. Connection: do the opposite
When you're close to burnout, the last thing you want is to be around people. You want to isolate. So do exactly the opposite. In psychology this is called opposite action: when an emotion pushes you to withdraw, you lean in instead.
- Spend time with people. Call a friend. Go to the family dinner. Connection is one of the fastest ways out of that numbness.
- Share how you really feel. Being honest about what's going on lets you be heard and validated, and it lightens the load more than you'd expect.
- Ask for help. This was one of my biggest lesson all those years ago. From friends, from a mental health professional, from a coach like me, from a therapist. And at work, talk to your boss if you're overloaded and close to the edge.
3. Boundaries: knowing your no, and your yes
Setting boundaries isn't only about saying no. It's also about knowing what to say yes to: what truly matters to you. Once you know, you communicate it. That's how you show people how you want to be treated and how they can come into your space.
Boundaries can look like:
- Taking the vacation. Yes, really. Put it on the calendar.
- A time limit at work. A clear end to your workday that you stick to.
- Delegating. If it's too much, hand some of it off. If you've worked all day and are caring for three or four kids, let your partner or someone else in the family make dinner.
- Changing the situation. Sometimes, after you've set your boundaries and they keep getting pushed, the healthiest move is to find a way out: a different team or department that doesn't overload you, for example.
Write yourself a permission slip
One practice ties all three pillars together. Take a sticky note and finish this sentence: "I give myself permission to ________." To rest. To say no. To ask for help. To just be.
Read it out loud, then add: "It's safe for me to just be." Put it somewhere you'll see it every day.
You don't have to do this alone
Rest isn't a reward for finishing everything. It's what makes everything else possible. Read this again.
Start with one small action from each pillar this week, and build from there.
If there's anything I didn't cover in this series, please tell me. I'd love to know what I missed, and I'd love to help you with your questions.
As for the 2001 version of me, she figured out what kind of rest she needed, she spoke to her bosses, took 10 days off work and went to Brazil to regroup and recharge. She came back with more clarity on how to proceed and a set of boundaries that allowed her to continue to grow, this time around in a healthy way.
My free Permission to Pause worksheet [LINK] walks you through all three pillars and helps you plan your week. And if you'd like support finding your way back, grab a FREE Coffee & Chat with me here: https://attractwell.com/ChrisDrewCoaching/scheduler/coffee-chat
0 Comments